Ain’t that somethin’?

Another sickening cliche, eh? Well I’m feeling like now is the time to start living. When everything else is dead; shops, streets, beaches. Actually from what I’ve heard people aren’t listening to the advice given around this Corona virus and are going out regardless. How selfish. Also I can’t even get a Sainsbury’s delivery. I wonder if I could convince them that I count as a vulnerable person as I am out of my mind and I’ve got only a community shop and no wheels.

I’ve been in bed the past few days. Exhausted. So exhausted, in fact, that I had to stop coding for my job on Friday and just collapse. My boss was very understanding and I even took today, Monday as well. I contacted the doctor, they have said they’ve checked my blood test from around a year ago and said it’s unlikely to be physical. So all I’m actually left with is eating apples. I’m just going to have to do it. Call it a metaphor.

I have ideas in my head. I feel like I’ve never lived so I’m going to get started. In a way. Maybe. I talk like this from time to time. All talk no trousers, but this is the beginning. I need a piece of glass or perspex for a picture I’m going to hang. I’ve got a frame, a very nice sixty pound one made of decent wood too. The wire’s on for landscape but I got a hammer, I can change that. Expect an image soon, once I get my glass or perspex. I’d prefer glass I think. Nobody used perspex years ago. Not that I knew of anyway. Maybe everybody did.

I’m going to mix up my music. I love Tom Waits but if I hear Jersey Girl one more time I’m going to kill him. And my PC. Actually it’s youtube’s fault.

Considering a bonsai tree. They’re expensive so let’s stick with just one for now.

I’ll get up at seven or eight tomorrow. Seven. If I get up at seven then I can start work at eight. God I hope there’s enough to keep me occupied. I’ll go out of my mind if there isn’t. I hope I don’t need to keep badgering people too. Often the tasks lack description and I’m better with the written stuff than the talky stuff, but if the written stuff’s not there I’m just waiting to fall. No idea if I’ll be able to keep my job as it’s the end of my probation in May. I am suspecting not, but I need to keep going.

The diet’s going to change. I might quite enjoy this apocalypse. My apologies to those who have lost people and the terror it’s causing across the world, the idea of enjoying it probably sounds like blaspheme, but I’m going to make the best of it. I need to be ruthless and real and understand the things in my house I actually want vs those that I don’t. Books I never read that have followed me since my early twenties. Fuck. Where have those years gone? I’ve done nothing.

I will get to painting. But I want to do the tonal studies given first. Yes. Expect another scan. Maybe I’ve just been depressed and not motivated for the past twenty years and not conscious of the former, I’ve wondered why the latter exists. I do find most situations boring. A new career? Would need to study. I’d love, love, love to do something with my hands though. Preferably something arty. I can do that though. In my home.

New clothes, and glass for the picture. I need some new tops. I might even get some colour.

Lying in bed all day agrees with me apparently.

Yes. I know. I’m a self-centred pig. I’ve not said a lot about the Corona virus. Except I will say this. Corona means crown which refers to its shape under a microscope. Ain’t that somethin’?

Yes. I know the writing’s been weak for ages. I think I’ve said everything. I’m going to get more visual now I hope. Maybe all you’ll get are images in the future.